Confessions of Bennion weirdness...no wait... we aren't weird ....you are

Some people are positively GOOEY over their pets.

Not the Bennions. Not any of us. Not even the ones that married into the family. We are all unified in our hate of animals.

In fact, Scott's nickname is "The Terminator" Just go ahead and use your imagination to figure out what that means.

I did like one pet...... Freddy the Pig. Actually we changed Freddy's name to LaTrina when we found out it was a girl pig after we a year when one of us got the courage to check.

La Trina loved to eat stale chips and I got a vicarious thrill out her ravenous hunger. She ate with such amazing gusto and had no guilt over her humongous gut. Sigh...If only I didn't care like LaTrina.

(Weird, tho, I took LaTrina to the Jack in the Box drive thru and she wouldn't eat her cheeseburger)

Sadly, LaTrina succumbed to the same fate as every other animal within the Terminators sphere of influence. Ask Scotty about the Pig story someday, it's quite the saga.

Anyway, don't be bringing your pets around, none of us care a single ounce for those poopy smelly animals. Sorry, we are all cold like that. Just live with it. Its not a character flaw, but a virtue.


robin said...

i could not agree with you more on this subject. i do not understand how people choose to coexist with furry, shedding, smelly animals.

i mean, they go outside to do their business, they don't wipe, and then their nasty butts are sitting on the couch!


aubry. said...

that's why we're friends, robin.

i thought i found the man of my dreams when he told me he didn't like pets. that was definitely a step in the right direction.

Bennions said...

You're crazy. I love animals and people like you and Scotty should be reported! Sorry but our kids will definitely break the Bennion chain of animal haters.

Rebecca said...

oh Oksana you have a 50 50 chance of having animal hating offspring. Sorry but the "force is strong" in our gene pool.